Existential Punk

Starting With Our WEAKNESS. . .

My good friend Peter (www.emergingchristian.com) and i are beginning a cooperative blog series of posts writing about what it means to argue from a position of weakness. We resonated deeply with and were inspired from my dear friend, author/thinker/lecturer/philosopher, Pete Rollins:

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What we tend to do is… whenever we are in an argument I will argue from the place of strength, the strongest part of my argument, and direct is at the weakest part of your argument. And you will in turn take the strongest part of your argument and attack the weakest part of my argument. And what I really want to do is to enter into dialogs where I can talk about the weakest part of my argument and you can talk about the weakest part of your argument. and I can accept and celebrate the strongest part of your arguments and visa-versa.

Peter Rollins, from a Nick and Josh Podcast Interview

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i think Rollins hits the nail on the head. We like to hammer people with our insights, revelations, and opinions without really listening to the other person(s) even though we say we are listening. Thus, we end up being narcissistically focused on our own strengths and relish in the weaknesses of others we are in conversation/dialogue with at the moment. i agree with Peter when he says, 'This is probably less about egotism, and more about the brokenness and insecurity of most people. We protect “our weak” by overemphasizing “our strong.” And in doing so, we’re not being entirely honest, are we?' That is what narcissism is, being broken and insecure, which as imperfect human beings, is a big part of our DNA.

i am like Peter and definitely have weaknesses built into me. i tire of inauthenticity and hiding, even though at times that is easier and are masks i will put on to protect myself. Yet, because i am tired of hiding my weaknesses, i'd like to share them with you. As Peter says, 'This demands a difficult level of vulnerability and transparency. It means you’ll have an opportunity to attack where I’m least “defended.'" ' So, we have decided to take the leap and reveal and share our weaknesses with you for the sake of open dialogue/conversation.

i quote what Peter says so eloquently:

'In turn, you have strengths that may frustrate me, confound me, or directly refute something about my beliefs! But they are strengths, nonetheless. And by ignoring or underestimating them, I don’t just weaken my particular “position” (we must get beyond these adversarial identifiers) but I also underestimate and even undervalue your worth, and the complexity of your experiences that have led you to where you are.'

Over the next couple of weeks, Peter and i will be co-op blogging on our own weaknesses, on the strengths we find in opposing DIFFERING viewpoints and belief systems, and we will be reflecting on why this is such a radically different way of dialoguing!

YOU are invited to join us at either...

* www.ExistentialPunk.com OR
* www.EmergingChristian.com

My First Official Ocean Dive Trip!

It's official, we have FINALLY booked our dive trip with Ocean Divers in Key Largo, Florida! Katryna dived with them last August with her underwater photography class with Stephen Frink and really enjoyed diving with them. i went out one day to snorkle and had an enjoyable day despite getting a fish hickey on my left knee from a chub fish who mistook me for some fish food! This is my official 40th Birthday gift from my beautiful and awesome wife! Thanks, honey!

We will be heading out to drive down to Key West first for a couple of days on July 16th, where we will be staying for two nights at Pearls Rainbow, a resort for women! We head to Key LArgo on Sunday, July 19th and begin diving in Key Largo July 20th - 24th. FIVE DAYS OF GLORIOUS DIVING! WOO HOO!!! i am REALLY stoked!

Here is some info about the Florida Keys i just learned today, thanks to Ocean Divers:

WHAT IS A KEY?

'A "key" is an island where there is no natural source of fresh water.

 The Florida Keys are "islands" formed by ancient coral reefs. At one time, all of what is now Florida was beneath the surface of the ocean. During that time, massive coral reefs were formed. As the water level on the whole planet subsided, the tops of these reefs were no longer covered by water. Over time, sediment, seeds deposited by birds, and "nature"  produced the tropical paradise of the Florida Keys.'

IMPORTANT Lyme Disease Legislation Introduced

'Sen. Christopher Dodd (D-CT), a senior member of the Senate Health, Education, Labor and Pensions Committee and Chairman of its Subcommittee on Children and Families, along with Sen. Susan Collins (R-ME), have introduced the Lyme and Tick-Borne Disease Prevention, Education, and Research Act of 2009. The bill is co-sponsored by Sen. Jack Reed (D-RI), Sen. Joe Lieberman (ID-CT), Sen. Sheldon Whitehouse (D-RI), and Sen. Benjamin Cardin (D-MD).'

READ THE REST OF THE ARTICLE HERE.

PLEASE PHONE YOUR CONGRESS PEOPLE AND INSIST THAT THEY SUPPORT THIS VERY IMPORTANT LEGISLATION FOR ALL OF US LYME DISEASE & OTHER TICK-BORNE DISEASES SUFFERERS! LYME DISEASE IS AT EPIDEMIC PROPORTIONS, WORSE THAN HIV/AIDS! PLEASE TELL EVERYONE YOU KNOW ABOUT THIS LEGISLATION! THANK YOU! As someone who suffers daily with this HORRIBLE and GHASTLY disease that has wreaked havoc on my entire being, PLEASE help me and all the others who suffer mercilessly with this disease that is HELL ON EARTH!

The Simultaneity Of Deconstruction & Re/Construction

Wikipedia has the following to say about deconstruction:

'...an approach (whether in philosophy, literary analysis, or in other fields) which rigorously pursues the meaning of a text to the point of undoing the oppositions on which it is apparently founded, and to the point of showing that those foundations are irreducibly complex, unstable or impossible.

Deconstruction generally operates by conducting close textual readings with a view to demonstrating that the text is not a discrete whole but that it instead contains several irreconcilable, contradictory meanings. This process shows that any text has more than one interpretation; that the text itself links these interpretations inextricably; that the incompatibility of these interpretations is irreducible; and thus that interpretative reading cannot go beyond a certain point...'

Many Christians, in my opinion, even within emerging church circles, misunderstand what deconstructing our faith really entails. Often they say it is time to stop deconstructing and that it's time to move on to reconstruct and rebuild what has been deconstructed. Then there are those Christians who believe deconstructing and reconstructing becomes an exercise in relativism and creating the scriptures and G-D in our own image. i do not claim to fully understand deconstruction in the Deriddean philosophical vein, but Pete Rollins crystallizes deconstruction so clearly in the emerging church construct for me (HT: Jonathan Brink):

'A lot of people talk about deconstruction like this.They say, “Well we’ve got to deconstruct and then once we’ve deconstructed, we can rebuild.”

And I want to stop at that point and say, “No.  We never cease to deconstruct.  Deconstruction is not like knocking down a building so we can clear a space to build something new.  Deconstruction is like the heat that keeps our ideas fluid and molten and moving and dynamic.” '

For me, deconstruction and re/construction are a simultaneous process that need each other. We must constantly question, rethink, seek, search, doubt, dig, knock, push, tear, rupture, deconstruct, reconstruct. We must also allow the Divine to invade, rupture, embrace, invade, transform, deconstruct, reconstruct us in ways we might expect but also in unexpected ways that are beyond our human imaginings. We are imperfect humans who can never claim to fully comprehend and understand the Divine. We, as people of faith, MUST and NEED to make room for the Divine to invade us without our preconceived notions. There can never be any human being who can claim absolute knowledge of everything about this life and the Divine. i don't care how knowledgeable, studied, gifted, et al any of us are, we are still fallible, imperfect humans who always screw up and get it wrong. No amount of knowledge, theology, Biblical literacy, intuition, etc. can outdo what G-D designs to accomplish. G-D is a relational Divinity that is not stagnant and stuck in a certain epoch.

i am mesmerized and humbled when Rollins boldly says that, 'I do not believe Christians are called to believe in the resurrection of Christ.  I believe we are called to be the resurrection of Christ.  To be the site where resurrection takes place.' That statement is amazing and has such deep implications for our faith. Take time to mull on those 33 words and allow them to really sink down into your being, your soul! This is deep stuff people.

We get so wrapped up in what we believe and don't believe so much that we are failing to really listen to the indwelling of the Divine and the radical transformation that the Divine desires to bring forth and rupture in our souls. We get in this us vs. them mentalities, argue over who has the right/correct beliefs, who is in and who is out. So often we are all so very ungenerous, whether conservative, liberal or in the middle. i know i am very guilty of this and for that i am truly sorry. My pride and hurt feelings get the best of me more often than not. i truly want to be a site where Christ's resurrection takes place. i am human and will fail often. At least i acknowledge my weaknesses and human frailties although it is very difficult and humbling. Sometimes i don't care that i fuck up and treat people ungenerously. That is one of the many dark parts of my soul where i need the Divine to rupture and transform me. Even in my unwillingness i need G-D to embrace me, transform me, deconstruct and reconstruct me.

These are merely my musings, thoughts, rants. Maybe i am wrong or just maybe i am on to something. Either way, i hope i challenge you, dear readers, to chew and ponder. i am not attempting to sway you to my way of thinking, lead you astray, or change your minds. This is simply my space to throw out what is ruminating in my soul and my being. i am just trying to make some sense of my feelings, thoughts and meanderings inside my little ol' mind! If you are here reading this and find yourself vehemently disagreeing with me, i am ok with that. Even if i am way off track, i trust the Divine G-D of the universe will gently nudge me back on track. That is how i have always lived and walked with G-D, and so far G-D has been the faithful one!

What do you think?

Bipartisanshit!

OK, so i am just one voter in this great country and my opinions and thoughts are my own, though i know that some out there share those with me. i do applaud President Obama working to bridge gaps, build coalitions and work towards bipartisanship. YET, when the GOP, now known as the Party of NO, works consistently against you and your agenda, not meeting you halfway, thus bringing gridlock in which nothing gets done, it is time to get a spine. The majority of the nation elected Obama and the democrats because they want a progressive agenda - Everyone gets healthcare coverage, healthcare is reformed, Wall Street needs to be MAJORLY reigned in and Mainstreet gets the help they need, and an effective energy plan where we work to getting off our addiction to oil, which will aid our environmental issues and security. AND don't even get me started on Obama's campaign promises of getting rid of the antiquated DADT and DOMA. If the Civil Rights Movement waited until they had a consensus we may still not see African Americans having many rights today and Obama may not have even been able to run for president. So, come on, get off this BIPARTISANSHIT, President Obama and Democrats. If YOU don't find a spine and quit backing down and giving in to special interest groups and the Party of NO, then in 2010 at the midterm elections, people will vote YOU out. i am glad i am an Independent because BOTH parties drive me crazy. If i don't start seeing some REAL CHANGE, i am voting third party next time. DO WHAT THE PEOPLE WHO ELECTED YOU WANT YOU TO DO! YOU HAVE A FUCKING MANDATE, SO BE LIKE NIKE AND JUST DO IT! BE WARNED, DEMOCRATS, GET SOME BALLS AND A SPINE!

TypePad Technical Difficulties

TypePad is currently having TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES where i cannot respond to comments via email. i noticed about 8 comments did not post so i opened a ticket with them. They told me others were experiencing this problem and they were investigating. i had to send them the date and time i responded along with the email reply address. HOPEFULLY this will be resolved soon! So, to all my faithful readers, i apologize but wanted to let you know i was not ignoring you! i value your thoughts and would never intentionally ignore you! Thanks for your patience and understanding while TypePad figures this out.

Think Different!

'Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They’re not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can’t do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.'
    - Think Different at Wikipedia

Lately i have been getting a bit more visibility because of starting Queermergent back in January. A lot has been a great and joyous experience with much love and support. Yet, not all has been as positive because many very conservative Christian right wingers have been brutal in their attacks and criticisms of me and some very dear friends. i just want to clear the air a bit. First, this is my blog and my musings, rants, thoughts are all my own, and where i often process what is going on inside my soul. i do not claim to have life all figured out nor do i try to change minds. What i like to do is process my inner conversations here on my blog. i may say something today and change my mind tomorrow, next week, next year, five years from now, and so on. Or i may not change my mind on something. That's my prerogative. What i do attempt to do is challenge all of us, including myself, to think differently and to be open minded. Second, i do not represent or speak for the emerging church and/or Emergent Village. The views, opinions, thoughts, rants, musings, etc. represented here at Existential Punk are my own except where referenced by a link.

Caryn Solly, an atheist who attends Jay Bakker's Revolution Church in NYC, has this to say about being open-minded that really challenged me:

'As a left-leaning Democrat, I have often found that people misuse the words “open-minded.”  It’s a term often used to describe a liberal point of view.  Political liberals have strong opinions and often aren’t willing to budge on them.  That’s OK, and good even.  We all feel that way about many things in our lives, like the value of family or how human beings came to be on this Earth.

However, this is not what open-minded means.  To be open-minded is to free yourself from yourself.  Are you open to changing your mind?  Are you willing to let in new ideas and weigh them against what you currently think?  Are you willing to walk a new path if you find that a new idea has merit?  I find a lot of inspiration in science, and the scientific method is a process of open-mindedness.  Scientists draw conclusions from data, not the other way around.  This is what open-minded means, and to me, it is an essential part of a true spiritual journey, no matter where you started walking.'

i find that i struggle at certain times to be truly open-minded but i aspire to be, and Caryn's comments reminded and challenged me to be even more open to all this. i allow comments on my blog that disagree with me and i think a lot about what people say to me, hard or easy. What i really struggle with are those people who focus on what they believe to be wrong, un-Biblical beliefs of others, criticize those beliefs, and never focus on their own lives, what they believe in or what they might be experiencing in their own faith journeys. They rather judge others and deflect from themselves. In other words, they care only about looking at the speck in the eyes of others rather than focusing on the planks in their own eyes. We all have issues but what i find maddening is when people have an answer at every turn and don't really listen to others. This happens on both the left and the right, liberal and conservative and all the places in between. We are human and no one is immune. Yet, those who have an answer for everything and can't admit they could be wrong drive me crazy!

i am not out to convert people to my way of thinking. i do have opinions and certain beliefs. i could be wrong about many things, but i live my life as authentically as i can. i am really a lot like the definition of Apple's 'Think Different' campaign! My detractors can vilify me, disagree with me, quote me, but you will never silence me. i want to be about pushing boundaries, challenging the status quo, and help to push the human race forward with the help of the Divine rupturing my soul. So, i challenge ALL of us to THINK DIFFERENT!

Shalom!

Status Quo Christianity

Many people say Christianity has been the same for over 2,000 years and that we must follow tradition. 'G-D says it, so that settles it' is often quoted as well. BOLLOCKS in my opinion. Just because many things in Christian tradition have been around for many years, centuries even, does not mean that they are correct or what G-D intended. For me much of what passes as Christian tradition is just status quo Christianity. Watching 3 seasons of the HBO series, 'The Tudors', shows me one aspect of power plays, political and religious ambitions, and pride played out in the development of Christianity in England. If that was all true then, why would it not be true during the times the books off the Bible were written, when Christianity developed, and the Canon was created? We see it today in the USA in the political maneuverings of BOTH the democrats and the republicans. I once asked my history teacher in high school why we have to study history. She told me because history repeats itself and we must learn all the good and bad from our predecessors. That made so much sense to me and I was then able to engage my history classes with a deeper understanding and a new found appreciation. I am in no way saying there are not truths to me gleaned from the Bible. I also believe in taking the scriptures very seriously, wrestling with them and searching out what the authors' original intents within their historical and cultural contexts meant. That, to me, is taking the Bible seriously. Reading the Bible as a literal book without taking into account of seeking out what the authors might have really intended is disingenuous to them and the scriptures. U do not believe in a specific dispensation where there was only a specific time in history where G-D spoke to certain people. I believe G-D is alive and speaking to people at all times, including today. What that looks like exactly I am not sure. When I listen to music by Moby, or read a book by Kirk Vonnegut, I experience raw human emotions in a creative way that tell stories about the human condition. Isn't that what so much of the Bible is about anyways? It's not to me Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth (BIBLE) or a treatise on doctrine and theology, but rather G-D's interaction with an imperfect yet often beautiful creation. G-D is not about status quo Christianity, but authentic, gut-wrenching, radical way of life where G-D interacts with us and transforms us by rupturing our entire being. Status quo Christianity is a cacophony of ineffectual and neutering voices that perpetuates an existence rather than bringing transformation and a place of truly living. It is consumeristic and narcissistic. It is afraid of change, and is frightened and threatened by anyone who attempts to deafen this rotting cacophony. Those who try and break through the cacophony are branded heretics, apostates, and lovers of evil who are bound for hell. Please be reminded we are ALL humans, no matter what time period we lived in, and we all get gripped with pride and thirst for power. It is simply part of our commonality of being imperfect humans, no matter where and when we walked this earth.

21st Century Thoughts On Christianity & Evangelism

"Christians should be troublemakers, creators of uncertainty, agents of a dimension incompatible with society."

     - Jacques Ellul

'But in regards to evangelism, I would hope that my witnessing (in both word and deed) to my own faith may guide the course of others as they discern God’s call on their life. For some, but not all, that may mean changing faiths, and if Westerners do so rather freely I don’t want to impinge upon someone else’s ability to do the same. Ultimately where they or I move on the faith continuum may not be as important as the fact that through our encounter we nudge, prod, and love each other towards being something different, something better than we were before we met. I’ve never had any encounter like this that wasn’t as some point messy. But they were worth it. And its likely my theological understanding of the Holy Spirit that allows me to make peace with that.'

    - Joe (from comment #12 at a pomomusings post on Plurality 2.0)

i really resonated with both of these things said by two different people that i read today. The first was retweeted on Twitter and the second was a comment on a post by Nanette Sawyer at pomousings. i don't know about you, but i am often a troublemaker. Often i try to be one in a good sense where i challenge people, their thinking and their assumptions. This is a good thing as this is how we grow. Jesus was a troublemaker, a rabble rouser, especially when confronting the Pharisees of his day. i no longer live in a life of uncertainty certainty because life is not perfect and very far from certain. i rather be honest in expressing this rather than walking around happy clappy and in a false sense of certainty that i find to be too inauthentic. Jesus' radical message went against societal norms and irritated the status quo. In other words, Jesus was an 'agent of a dimension incompatible with society.' i desire to model Jesus in this way and i often do, being told i am reprobate, a sinner, going to hell, burn in hell for eternity, not a Christian, et al. The thing is, i know i am a sinner falling short everyday. i am in need of G-D's grace and mercy every second, every ninute, every hour, every day, every week, every month, every year, always until the day i take my last breath! As humans, we are all going to fail and succeed. It's just part of the human condition.

Adam Walker Cleaveland's series on Plurality 2.0 has been wonderful and i encourage you to check out the diverse voices he has contributing to the series. The second quote above was in response to one of the more interesting posts i resonated with. My ideas on evangelism and the exclusiveness of the Gospel and Christianity has changed and evolved over the past several years. For me, the crux of evangelism has become about furthering along my own conversion through encounters with the others i meet in my life. In addition to that thought, Joe saying, 'Ultimately where they or I move on the faith continuum may not be as important as the fact that through our encounter we nudge, prod, and love each other towards being something different, something better than we were before we met.' is just another dimension of how i view evangelism. It's not about getting someone to assent to some particular dogma or doctrine, but in how the Divine meets each of us in our encounters with one another and transforms us through those encounters. As he says, these encounters can be messy, but life is messy, faith is messy, authentic relationships are messy. i rather be authentic and messy than neat, inauthentic and so very certain about everything.

What are your thoughts?

Irreligiosophy Podcast

Leighton and Chuck at Irreligiosophy have their interview with me and Pete Rollins up today. Check it out as it's billed as their best podcast to date! Thanks guys!